Category: Blogs

Daddy, Do You Have Time?

Every now and then my daughter will ask if I have time. For her, my having time means we do something together. For example, play a card game, or Snakes and Ladders Game among other things. This past Saturday as we were headed out to do some shopping with her, she asked if I had some free time later.

I laid out my plans of the day for her. Part of my plans included going to help a family friend who needed my assistance. My daughter (7 years old) realized my schedule was somewhat full. Noticing her disappointment, I asked her what she had in mind. Her answer surprised me.

“Daddy, it is okay, you can go help our family friend. You see, you will always have me…but you will not always have him! So, it is okay.” She added with a sad but convincing tone.

I felt my heart sink. At 7 years of age…I did not want my daughter to have to make such tough decisions just to fit in my busy schedule. Consequently, moving forward, I have resolved to make time on a regular basis to ‘just do their’ things. Not that I have not been doing it already…but now, it will be ‘my kids time in their own terms.’ Say a prayer for me…this is not going to be easy…

The following took place in a Cardiac Intensive Care Unit where our eldest daughter -Kui, was a patient. The nurse assigned to care for Kui was called Linda. On this particular day, the rest of the family had come to visit Kui and enjoy some much needed family time. Rita, our youngest daughter on getting to see her sister all connected to machines realized that she had some heart ‘challenges’ she was dealing with. That however did not dampen Rita’s spirit. She was her usual jovial and cordial self.

She quickly connected with Linda the nurse. They played cards games, shared jokes and more. Out the blue, Rita offered me a dollar to give to Linda our nurse saying…”Daddy, please give this dollar to Linda, I know she needs it.” My immediate reaction was to ignore Rita’s request and tell her to keep her dollar. More so, I was not about to embarrass Linda by offering her a dollar from a 6 year old child. In addition, I did not want to be mean to Rita…my mind battles were still going on when Rita and the rest of the family left to return back home.

I summoned all my courage and offered Linda the dollar. She turned it down out rightly. However, I reasoned with her telling her, it would be unkind to turn down a child’s act of kindness. she begrudgingly accepted the dollar. I thought nothing more about the incident. Linda however was very touched by the event. She made a ‘dollar heart’ and wrote the letter below to Rita.

Dear Rita

Thank you so much for your gift. I

really appreciate it and am so

touched by your kindness. In

return, I want to give you a dollar

back, but it is folded into a heart

so you will always remember me

by. Don’t worry, I will always keep

the dollar you gave me as a good

luck charm. Lastly, stay strong for

your big sister. You are doing

such a great job already.

                        Love,

                        Linda

I am surely glad, I let go the formalities and expectations of my current world…All these would not have happened if I had kept the dollar to avoid ‘inconveniences.’ Have a free day…

In an effort to teach our children to be responsible, we asked them to take turns to clean dishes after dinner. Naturally, I expected the kids to ask us (parents) to pick someone to do it on the said day. Instead they sorted the agenda fairly quickly.

I heard them play the game Rock, Paper, Scissor, and Shoe. In a minute or two, Martin lost the game. Hence, with no further ado,  he headed to the kitchen sink to clean the dishes. Their simple act on such an important decision got me thinking. I mean, am married, and trust me decision making is not as simple as the kid’s game.

Often,words like compromise, have it your way this time, you get a pass for this time, are just but a few of the choices in decision making by couples. Now if only we can take a lesson from the kids especially during this holiday season!?

It has been a very interesting year for us here at DR&KIDS. Indeed, we must admit that God’s hand has been over us. For we have seen and witness events and amazing support from friends and family alike. Thank you.

The year started with a looming deadline on a government matter that could not be ignored. Yet, the person we hoped was going to help us address the matter dropped the ball. We had to scrabble and get a replacement with less than 45 days to meet the deadline. Our Prayers were answered in the nick of time and the rest is history. https://www.drandkids.com/home/

A few weeks later as we were still sipping and tossing to the victory of a deadline met, a sports physical for our daughter turned the tables. This was the biggest temptation of our faith. For suddenly, a child who had walked herself to her pediatrician and consequently referred to the Emergency Room for a quick ECG (EKG) was now in a cardiac intensive care unit, laden with wires and machines. The diagnosis made my wife and I, look at one another like, “THIS CAN’T BE REAL…OR TRUE. THE DOCTOR MUST HAVE MADE AN ERROR!”

Once again, your prayers and those of many others were answered. She pulled through. Needless to add, we had started another interesting chapter in our lives, we know now, we have a ‘heart warrior’ child. Our new chapter of ‘heart challenge’ (Many like to call it heart disease…but I do not see it that way). Heart challenge because, ‘she shall overcome.’ And overcome, she has. She would go on to graduate high school, Salutatorian, despite missing a couple weeks of school, start a trade and is now in High School. She had High Honors for her first marking period.

It’s Thanksgiving. We are grateful to God. We are grateful to our family and friends who came through for us during our greatest times of need. You know not how much your support helped us, and has helped us. We at DR&KIDS take this moment to pray for all of you and wish you all a blessed and joyful Thanksgiving. Thank you for your kindness, generosity and prayers.